You’re Not Alone (IX)

I’m not saying these are all about me. I’m just saying if you feel the same, or you have done it too, you’re not alone.

You’re not alone if…

1. You wish the cashier would just add on the extra dollar for charity instead of putting you on the spot and making you feel bad.

2. You could fall asleep right this minute.

3. You tell your kids to run in a zig zag if they are being chased by someone who has a gun because if someone is shooting at you, zig zag running is just good sense.

4. You sometimes forget to shower for a day. Sometimes two days. Three days is gross though. Take a shower, Pigpen.

5. Your daughter loves bows and taffeta and all things fancy.

6. Your son is busting through his clothes, his shoes and everything in your house.

7. Your daughter is into mud and worms and all things dirty.

8. Your son digs show tunes.

9. You see your UPS delivery person more than you see your friends.

10. You asked your kids what they were eating and they chose, instead, to open wide and show you.

11. The car wash gives you anxiety. Getting your car on the track. No likey.

12. The smell of patchouli oil makes you gag.

13. You get depressed when you’re done binge watching a great show like OZ because you miss everyone so much, and then you wonder what that says about you because all the characters you love are convicted felons.

14. You don’t know what side of the car your gas tank is on.

15. You make Siri refer to you as Princess or Lord.

16. You will never get over Prince’s death because he was a legend and he was brilliant and he helped shape major parts of your life. Your kids, however, are over it.

17. You believe references to any of The Godfather movies should be prefaced with “SPOILER ALERT!” because even though they are over 40 years old, not everyone has gotten around to seeing them yet.

18. You can’t parallel park and the people who can are show offs.

19. You don’t like Starbucks coffee.

20. You accidentally hit REPLY ALL on an email and things didn’t go well from there.

21. You get totally grossed out by little, curly hairs on soap.

22.  You hear about a fatal disease and you are convinced you have it because all the symptoms line up, but there’s no time to in a doctor appointment in so you eat a doughnut instead.

Image result for doughnut

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13 Comments

  1. Sara on April 24, 2016 at 12:47 am

    Now I know I’m not alone 😉



    • Robyn on April 24, 2016 at 7:30 am

      You love these. Zig Zag running.



  2. Eddie on April 24, 2016 at 1:59 am

    Your not alone if after all the years of raising your kid in your own you experience a moment of pure joy and happiness…a moment when you know he is the best thing you ever did. My boy graduated on Thursday…cap, gown, the whole bit. It a very solemn ceremony I may have just let out a ‘woo hoo’ and embarrassed my boy but I made him…a woo hoo was the least I could’ve done.
    You’re not alone when you know the whole crazy ride of bringing up kids is so worth it. I’m so lucky I’m his mum.



    • Robyn on April 24, 2016 at 7:29 am

      Totally worth it and I agree, the woo hoo was the least you could have done. You’ve done so much more. You’ve done everything. You deserve the WOO HOO so I’m giving it to you XOXOX 🙂



  3. Libby on April 24, 2016 at 9:16 am

    Show tunes! Lol



  4. Mom on April 24, 2016 at 10:35 am

    “Car wash anxiety”. I hate it….always worried I won’t get on the track…
    You didn’t like going through the car wash when you were little…..remember the ropes dancing on the windows?



    • Robyn on April 25, 2016 at 11:00 am

      The dancing ropes! I do remember! Clearly, I haven’t gotten over certain childhood anxieties! Car washes, UGH! 🙂 XOX



  5. Angie Nickamin on April 24, 2016 at 11:09 am

    #numbertwentyone VOM!!!



    • Robyn on April 25, 2016 at 11:01 am

      SO VOM. Forever vom on that one. FOREVER. :)XO



  6. Karin on April 24, 2016 at 11:19 am

    12. The smell of patchouli oil makes you gag.
    ….so TRUE! Loved Asheville NC for the 2 years I lived there but the whole damn town smelled like this. Silly hippies?

    And Prince? Piper said she was sorry he died but to remember: I still have his music. And Taylor Swift is alive still. (She’s a huge TS fan)



    • Robyn on April 25, 2016 at 11:02 am

      So funny! My kids tried to make me feel better by telling me that Taylor Swift is still alive too. I’m sorry…I mean “Tay Tay.” I don’t think she wears patchouli. 🙂 XOXO



  7. Elizabeth on April 24, 2016 at 1:10 pm

    Going to change what Siri calls me right now!!
    I think “My Queen” will work nicely 🙂



    • Robyn on April 25, 2016 at 11:04 am

      You’re good. I should have gone for Queen instead of Princess. I feel like I might be overshooting it though. Plus, my mom will find out and she will be all “I’M THE QUEEN!!!” 🙁 xoxox